My BF emailed this passage to me months ago. This is a good read for people who are in a relationship, especially for husbands who have married the woman of their dreams. Enjoy!
When one finds a worthy wife, her value is far beyond pearls.
Her husband, entrusting his heart to her, has an unfailing prize.
She brings him good, and not evil, all the days of her life.
She obtains wool and flax and makes cloth with skillful hands.
Like merchant ships, she secures her provisions from afar.
She rises while it is still night, and distributes food to her household.
She picks out a field to purchase; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
She is girt about with strength, and sturdy are her arms.
She enjoys the success of her dealings; at night her lamp is undimmed.
She puts her hands to the distaff, and her fingers ply the spindle.
She reaches out her hands to the poor, and extends her arms to the needy.
She fears not the snow for her household; all her charges are doubly clothed.
She makes her own coverlets; fine linen and purple are her clothing.
Her husband is prominent at the city gates as he sits with the elders of the land.
She makes garments and sells them, and stocks the merchants with belts.
She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs at the days to come.
She opens her mouth in wisdom, and on her tongue is kindly counsel.
She watches the conduct of her household, and eats not her food in idleness.
Her children rise up and praise her; her husband, too, extols her:
"Many are the women of proven worth, but you have excelled them all."
Charm is deceptive and beauty fleeting; the woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.
Give her a reward of her labors, and let her works praise her at the city gates.
(Proverbs 31: 10-31)
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Pain.. Teardrops..
Noon, hindi ako iyakin. Madalas, naiiyak ako sa mababaw na bagay (tulad nang pag nilipat ni mama yung channel sa TV e paboritong movie ko yung palabas), o kaya kung gusto kong maiyak sa mga emo sessions ng mga retreat na pinupuntahan ko e kelangan ko pa pilitin ang sarili ko na umiyak (yung matagal kang hindi pipikit.. na-try mo na?)
Pero napansin ko, habang tumatagal kami ng bf ko, e bumababaw ang luha ko. Minsan, kaunting emosyon lang, naiiyak na ko. Pag nagagalit siya o kung may hindi kami pagkakaintidihan, naiiyak ako. Pag naiisip ko ang kinahinatnan ko dito sa opisina, naiiyak na ako. Kanina lang habang nagbabasa ako ng isang blog entry e naiiyak na naman ako.
In lighter sense, sabihin na lang din natin na mas madali na rin akong masaktan, physically. Noon, nakagat ako ng pusa and I had to endure 9 shots nung dinala ako sa RITM. Pero nung nakaraang nagkasakit ako, kinailangan din akong turukan ng gamot dahil medyo malala ang sakit ko (tonsilitis at UTI.. naknang.. ayaw naman masyadong magsabay-sabay nung mga bacteria na yun noh?), sumigaw ako nung kinunan ako ng dugo (at nagkapasa din later on), sumigaw ako habang sa skin test pa lang nung gamot, at lalo na nung actual injection na (kahit dapat hindi masyadong masakit ang turok saken kasi sa pwet naman ang site.. pero ewan ko ba..).. pagkatapos ng mga turok na yan, nanghina ako. Hindi ko tuloy lubos maisip kung paano ako nakatagal nung gabing nasa RITM ako.
Balik tayo sa iyakan issue.
Advantageous ba pag mababaw ang luha mo?
Well, siguro. Kasi mas nalalabas mo ang sama ng loob mo.
Naalala ko dati hirap ako kasi parating naiipon lang sa puso ko ang sakit na nararamdaman ko.
Ngayon, mas nagiging ok na ko.
O siguro nahawa na lang ako sa bf ko kasi mas mababaw ang luha nun. Iniiyakan ang mga palabas sa TV at kung ano pang mas mababaw na bagay.
Pero, proud ako para sa kanya kasi hindi siya tulad ng ibang lalake na ayaw magpakita ng emosyon.
Ah basta, kahit ano pa man ang maging issue o kalungkutan, kung talagang iyon lang ang makakatulong, e iiyak mo na lang.
Besides,
crying is healthy. :)
Pero napansin ko, habang tumatagal kami ng bf ko, e bumababaw ang luha ko. Minsan, kaunting emosyon lang, naiiyak na ko. Pag nagagalit siya o kung may hindi kami pagkakaintidihan, naiiyak ako. Pag naiisip ko ang kinahinatnan ko dito sa opisina, naiiyak na ako. Kanina lang habang nagbabasa ako ng isang blog entry e naiiyak na naman ako.
In lighter sense, sabihin na lang din natin na mas madali na rin akong masaktan, physically. Noon, nakagat ako ng pusa and I had to endure 9 shots nung dinala ako sa RITM. Pero nung nakaraang nagkasakit ako, kinailangan din akong turukan ng gamot dahil medyo malala ang sakit ko (tonsilitis at UTI.. naknang.. ayaw naman masyadong magsabay-sabay nung mga bacteria na yun noh?), sumigaw ako nung kinunan ako ng dugo (at nagkapasa din later on), sumigaw ako habang sa skin test pa lang nung gamot, at lalo na nung actual injection na (kahit dapat hindi masyadong masakit ang turok saken kasi sa pwet naman ang site.. pero ewan ko ba..).. pagkatapos ng mga turok na yan, nanghina ako. Hindi ko tuloy lubos maisip kung paano ako nakatagal nung gabing nasa RITM ako.
Balik tayo sa iyakan issue.
Advantageous ba pag mababaw ang luha mo?
Well, siguro. Kasi mas nalalabas mo ang sama ng loob mo.
Naalala ko dati hirap ako kasi parating naiipon lang sa puso ko ang sakit na nararamdaman ko.
Ngayon, mas nagiging ok na ko.
O siguro nahawa na lang ako sa bf ko kasi mas mababaw ang luha nun. Iniiyakan ang mga palabas sa TV at kung ano pang mas mababaw na bagay.
Pero, proud ako para sa kanya kasi hindi siya tulad ng ibang lalake na ayaw magpakita ng emosyon.
Ah basta, kahit ano pa man ang maging issue o kalungkutan, kung talagang iyon lang ang makakatulong, e iiyak mo na lang.
Besides,
crying is healthy. :)
Saturday, April 24, 2010
The Law of Programmers
Hanggang sa nalaman ko itong Law of Programmers at nagsimulang nagbago ang lahat. Kaya, gusto kong i-share ito sa inyo. Hindi ko na siguro kailangan pang i-explain pa kasi self-explanatory naman. Kung hindi pa ninyo alam, ewan ko na lang.
- RTFM = Read That F*cking Manual.
- Google is your bestfriend
- Phone a friend.
Monday, December 14, 2009
Apostles' Creed, by Mheng Torres
I believe in God, our Holy Father, who created heaven and earth.
I believe in Jesus His Son, who was conceived by our Mother because of her obedience through the power of the Spirit, to preach and to heal, but suffered and murdered proclaiming the Kingdom of God and for the atonement of sins, and as proclaimed, he rose again and seated at the right hand of our Father. He will come again to judge everyone from the past 'til the end of time.
I believe in the Spirit of God, the Holy Catholic Church, the foundation of Jesus, the communion of those who followed him, the forgiveness of sins for those who repent, the resurrection of the body and spirit, and everlasting life in the new earth Jesus promised. Amen.
I believe in Jesus His Son, who was conceived by our Mother because of her obedience through the power of the Spirit, to preach and to heal, but suffered and murdered proclaiming the Kingdom of God and for the atonement of sins, and as proclaimed, he rose again and seated at the right hand of our Father. He will come again to judge everyone from the past 'til the end of time.
I believe in the Spirit of God, the Holy Catholic Church, the foundation of Jesus, the communion of those who followed him, the forgiveness of sins for those who repent, the resurrection of the body and spirit, and everlasting life in the new earth Jesus promised. Amen.
Thursday, December 10, 2009
How you can really save the Philippines.
(a repost from: http://www.facebook.com/notes/definitely-filipino/how-you-can-really-save-the-philippines/195574934793)
It’s easy to say we love the Philippines, that we are full of Pinoy pride, etc. But how much of that feeling translates into action?
The best way to show love for country is in the little things we take for granted. No need to be heroic and get shot in Luneta to contribute to nation-building. Here are fifteen small changes you can do to start. There are over 300, 000 members of DF. Imagine how much we could change the Philippines if all of us did these!
1. Hold that straw! Plastic straws are among the most abundant debris found on beaches. Marine animals nibble on these, thinking they’re food. Remember: you are fully capable of drinking without the help of a plastic appendage.
2. Donate those tarps! Tarpaulins are made of non-biodegradable and non-recyclable stuff. Instead of throwing them away, donate them to Earth Day Network, an environmental NGO that turns them into schoolbags for less fortunate children around the Philippines. Contact Ms. Binggirl Clemente at earthday_village@yahoo.com for more details.
3. Chuck those (disposable) chopsticks: when dining at any Asian restaurant, bring your own reusable chopsticks. Though wooden chopsticks are biodegradable, they take a long time to decay and just add to the volume of solid waste in dumpsites. The annual production of chopsticks uses up to 90, 000 tons of wood, which comes from trees—climax of the plant kingdom and lungs of the earth.
4. Think big, buy big. We Filipinos have a tingi-tingi culture where everything must come small. Imagine the amount of waste we’d reduce if we bought in bulk! Instead of buying in sachets, reach for the big bottle. When traveling, just put the contents in smaller, refillable bottles that you can buy in any department store.
5. BamBOO YEAH: instead of planting a tree, plant bamboo—it’s a kind of grass, which means it grows faster. Other bamboo bonuses: it doesn’t need fertilizer, generates 35% more oxygen than a tree, and stores more CO2.
6. When buying ice cream, choose cones over cups. Note: cones are edible, cups are disposable.
7. Be a botante and not a bobotante: in the upcoming 2010 elections, read up on your candidates. See if there’s any green platform behind the yellow, the orange, and the hand symbols.
8. Spread the word: one person can make difference if she reduces her waste. But if she tells others, then those others tell even more others, then we can begin to effect change. It may be important to practice what you preach, but it’s equally important to preach what you practice.
9. Paper or plastic? One ton of paper bags is equivalent to 17 trees and generates five times as much solid waste as plastic. One ton of plastic bags consumes 11 barrels of crude oil and takes 1000 years to decompose. The answer: neither – bring your own! You can carry an eco-bag or just put your purchase in your own bag. While you’re at it, tell the cashier that you don’t need a plastic bag ‘cause you want to save the world. Trust us, it’ll make her smile.
10. Bring your own water bottle! 2.7 million tons of plastic are used for bottled water annually, about 90% of which end up in landfills. An average mineral water bottle costs about P20. If you stop buying one or two bottles a day, you can save up to P1120 a month. While you’re at it, bring your own tumbler too! When you’re going to meet your friends for coffee, hand the barista your own tumbler or ask for your drink in a mug. Starbucks Philippines even gives a P5 discount for those who bring their own!
11. Need to reload? Go to your nearest e-load or autoload suki! Those prepaid cards are made from and individually wrapped in plastic.
12. Learn to love refillables! When buying pens and highlighters, choose those that are refillable, like Stabilo. That way, when the ink runs out, you no longer have to buy new ones. Just walk to your nearest bookstore and ask for a refill.
13. Eliminate phantom drain: Believe your charger when it says BATTERY FULL – it does not lie. Plugged chargers still consume energy.
14. Give me the “green” light: Replace those incandescent bulbs into Compact Fluorescent Lightbulbs (CFLs). They may cost a bit more, but think long-term: CFLs consume ¼ of the electricity and last several years longer. Plus, they look like vanilla swirl ice cream!
15. Tara na, biyahe tayo! Have you trekked the Banaue Rice Terraces, chased after whale sharks in Donsol, and viewed the Chocolate Hills of Bohol? Explore your country’s natural resources to remind yourself what it is you are saving. After all, you can only protect what you love, and love what you experience.
Remember: we can’t advocate for big changes if we can’t do the little ones. The late Ninoy Aquino said that the Filipino is worth dying for. Allow me to rephrase: the Filipino is worth living for and most definitely worth greening for. Now go forth and greenify!
by Anna Oposa
Anna Oposa is writing a day early because she is in Japan for the Denso Youth for Earth Action Program to present an environmental project she will implement in UP-Diliman. By tomorrow, she will no longer have Internet access. On the 11th, she will be speaking in front of an international crowd wearing a Filipiniana.
It’s easy to say we love the Philippines, that we are full of Pinoy pride, etc. But how much of that feeling translates into action?
The best way to show love for country is in the little things we take for granted. No need to be heroic and get shot in Luneta to contribute to nation-building. Here are fifteen small changes you can do to start. There are over 300, 000 members of DF. Imagine how much we could change the Philippines if all of us did these!
1. Hold that straw! Plastic straws are among the most abundant debris found on beaches. Marine animals nibble on these, thinking they’re food. Remember: you are fully capable of drinking without the help of a plastic appendage.
2. Donate those tarps! Tarpaulins are made of non-biodegradable and non-recyclable stuff. Instead of throwing them away, donate them to Earth Day Network, an environmental NGO that turns them into schoolbags for less fortunate children around the Philippines. Contact Ms. Binggirl Clemente at earthday_village@yahoo.com for more details.
3. Chuck those (disposable) chopsticks: when dining at any Asian restaurant, bring your own reusable chopsticks. Though wooden chopsticks are biodegradable, they take a long time to decay and just add to the volume of solid waste in dumpsites. The annual production of chopsticks uses up to 90, 000 tons of wood, which comes from trees—climax of the plant kingdom and lungs of the earth.
4. Think big, buy big. We Filipinos have a tingi-tingi culture where everything must come small. Imagine the amount of waste we’d reduce if we bought in bulk! Instead of buying in sachets, reach for the big bottle. When traveling, just put the contents in smaller, refillable bottles that you can buy in any department store.
5. BamBOO YEAH: instead of planting a tree, plant bamboo—it’s a kind of grass, which means it grows faster. Other bamboo bonuses: it doesn’t need fertilizer, generates 35% more oxygen than a tree, and stores more CO2.
6. When buying ice cream, choose cones over cups. Note: cones are edible, cups are disposable.
7. Be a botante and not a bobotante: in the upcoming 2010 elections, read up on your candidates. See if there’s any green platform behind the yellow, the orange, and the hand symbols.
8. Spread the word: one person can make difference if she reduces her waste. But if she tells others, then those others tell even more others, then we can begin to effect change. It may be important to practice what you preach, but it’s equally important to preach what you practice.
9. Paper or plastic? One ton of paper bags is equivalent to 17 trees and generates five times as much solid waste as plastic. One ton of plastic bags consumes 11 barrels of crude oil and takes 1000 years to decompose. The answer: neither – bring your own! You can carry an eco-bag or just put your purchase in your own bag. While you’re at it, tell the cashier that you don’t need a plastic bag ‘cause you want to save the world. Trust us, it’ll make her smile.
10. Bring your own water bottle! 2.7 million tons of plastic are used for bottled water annually, about 90% of which end up in landfills. An average mineral water bottle costs about P20. If you stop buying one or two bottles a day, you can save up to P1120 a month. While you’re at it, bring your own tumbler too! When you’re going to meet your friends for coffee, hand the barista your own tumbler or ask for your drink in a mug. Starbucks Philippines even gives a P5 discount for those who bring their own!
11. Need to reload? Go to your nearest e-load or autoload suki! Those prepaid cards are made from and individually wrapped in plastic.
12. Learn to love refillables! When buying pens and highlighters, choose those that are refillable, like Stabilo. That way, when the ink runs out, you no longer have to buy new ones. Just walk to your nearest bookstore and ask for a refill.
13. Eliminate phantom drain: Believe your charger when it says BATTERY FULL – it does not lie. Plugged chargers still consume energy.
14. Give me the “green” light: Replace those incandescent bulbs into Compact Fluorescent Lightbulbs (CFLs). They may cost a bit more, but think long-term: CFLs consume ¼ of the electricity and last several years longer. Plus, they look like vanilla swirl ice cream!
15. Tara na, biyahe tayo! Have you trekked the Banaue Rice Terraces, chased after whale sharks in Donsol, and viewed the Chocolate Hills of Bohol? Explore your country’s natural resources to remind yourself what it is you are saving. After all, you can only protect what you love, and love what you experience.
Remember: we can’t advocate for big changes if we can’t do the little ones. The late Ninoy Aquino said that the Filipino is worth dying for. Allow me to rephrase: the Filipino is worth living for and most definitely worth greening for. Now go forth and greenify!
by Anna Oposa
Anna Oposa is writing a day early because she is in Japan for the Denso Youth for Earth Action Program to present an environmental project she will implement in UP-Diliman. By tomorrow, she will no longer have Internet access. On the 11th, she will be speaking in front of an international crowd wearing a Filipiniana.
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Friends come and go.
Merong isang pagkakataon na nakapag-usap ulit kami ng isang dating malapit na kaibigan. Natuwa ako sa pagkakataong yun kasi matagal na rin talaga ang huling beses na nagkausap kami kahit online lamang. At sa aming pag-uusap, kanyang pinakita ang mga graduation pictures niya na matagal na rin niyang ipinangako sa aking ipapakita niya (Ayaw niya kasi i-upload. Di ko alam kung bakit.).
Sa aking pagtingin sa kanyang mga litrato, hindi ko naiwasang magkomento, hanggang sa hindi ko namalayan, hindi na pala siya natutuwa sa mga nasabi ko. Humingi na lamang ako ng paumanhin sa aking mga nasabi, pero simula nung oras na iyon, may bumabagabag na sa akin.
As always, he has been open na hindi na nga siya natutuwa sa mga nasabi ko. Siguro e masyado akong naging kampante na tatanggapin lang niya ang mga sasabihin ko. Siguro e nasanay na rin akong magkomento sa litrato. Siguro masyado lang talaga akong naging taklesa. O siguro, hindi na nga rin kami talaga katulad ng dati.
At kung yung huling pangungusap nga ang pinakamabigat na dahilan, lubos naman akong nasasaktan.
Sa tagal ng aming communication gap, parang unti-unting napalayo ang loob ko sa kanya. Nagkakaroon na pala ng lamat ang dating inakala kong isang bagay na pang-habangbuhay.
At sa ngayon, sa totoo lang, hindi ko alam ang aking susunod na gagawin. Kung ililigtas ko pa ba ang dating samahan namin, o hahayaan ko na lamang na tuluyan na naming hindi na maibalik ang dati.
Mga ilang oras lamang ang nakalipas mula sa paggawa ng blog na ito, ay ka-chat ko naman sa Windows Live Messenger ang aking ka-opisinang matagal namang lumiban sa trabaho dahil nagkasakit. Nagulat na lamang ako na sa aking pangungumusta at sa aming pag-uusap ay binanggit niyang ako raw ang bestfriend niya dito sa opisina. BFF's na nga raw kami. (Corny ba? Hahaha. Inpernes ah, lalaki rin yan.)
Lubos ko namang ikinatuwa na ganun na pala ang nagiging presensya ko sa kanya. Hindi ko naman iyon itinanggi at ipinagkait sa kanya, bagkus, sa sumunod pa naming chat session at sa aming paglabas upang bumili ng pagkain e "bes" na ang naging tawagan namin.
Si Bes kong ito ay ang nagiging gamot sa sakit na naidulot ng pagkawalay sa akin ng isang kaibigan na kadugo ko na ang turing. Masaya naman ako ngayon kasi si Bes ay aking kasabay sa shift, at hindi pa kami magkalayo ng tirahan, kaya isang tao rin siyang alam kong maaari ko ring takbuhan.
Siguro nga talaga, friends come and go. Pati mga dati kong kabarkada, isa-isa na ring nawawala. Iilang mga tao na lang ang talagang natitira sa buhay kong nananatiling malalapit sa akin. Pero sa bawat pagkawala naman ng isang kaibigan, marami namang mga bagong mukha na pumapalit.
Pero hindi porket "friends come and go" nga eh hahayaan na lang rin natin na maging ganun ang mga pangyayari. Naniniwala pa rin ako na kung pagkakaibigan lang naman ang relasyon, maaari pa namang masagip yun. Alam kong iba pa rin ang ligayang madudulot ng mga "old friends" na talagang tumatak na sa mga puso at isip nating lahat.
Basta ang importante ngayon, pahalagahan ang bawat kaibigan. Binigay yan ng Panginoon upang may gawing isang importanteng bagay sa buhay mo. Ikaw na bahalang umalam ng dapat nilang maging misyon sa iyo. Kung sakaling mawala man sila, malungkot, oo, pero dapat maging masaya ka pa rin dahil dumaan sila sa buhay mo upang magdagdag ng kulay sa dating ordinaryo mong mundo.
Sa aking pagtingin sa kanyang mga litrato, hindi ko naiwasang magkomento, hanggang sa hindi ko namalayan, hindi na pala siya natutuwa sa mga nasabi ko. Humingi na lamang ako ng paumanhin sa aking mga nasabi, pero simula nung oras na iyon, may bumabagabag na sa akin.
As always, he has been open na hindi na nga siya natutuwa sa mga nasabi ko. Siguro e masyado akong naging kampante na tatanggapin lang niya ang mga sasabihin ko. Siguro e nasanay na rin akong magkomento sa litrato. Siguro masyado lang talaga akong naging taklesa. O siguro, hindi na nga rin kami talaga katulad ng dati.
At kung yung huling pangungusap nga ang pinakamabigat na dahilan, lubos naman akong nasasaktan.
Sa tagal ng aming communication gap, parang unti-unting napalayo ang loob ko sa kanya. Nagkakaroon na pala ng lamat ang dating inakala kong isang bagay na pang-habangbuhay.
At sa ngayon, sa totoo lang, hindi ko alam ang aking susunod na gagawin. Kung ililigtas ko pa ba ang dating samahan namin, o hahayaan ko na lamang na tuluyan na naming hindi na maibalik ang dati.
Mga ilang oras lamang ang nakalipas mula sa paggawa ng blog na ito, ay ka-chat ko naman sa Windows Live Messenger ang aking ka-opisinang matagal namang lumiban sa trabaho dahil nagkasakit. Nagulat na lamang ako na sa aking pangungumusta at sa aming pag-uusap ay binanggit niyang ako raw ang bestfriend niya dito sa opisina. BFF's na nga raw kami. (Corny ba? Hahaha. Inpernes ah, lalaki rin yan.)
Lubos ko namang ikinatuwa na ganun na pala ang nagiging presensya ko sa kanya. Hindi ko naman iyon itinanggi at ipinagkait sa kanya, bagkus, sa sumunod pa naming chat session at sa aming paglabas upang bumili ng pagkain e "bes" na ang naging tawagan namin.
Si Bes kong ito ay ang nagiging gamot sa sakit na naidulot ng pagkawalay sa akin ng isang kaibigan na kadugo ko na ang turing. Masaya naman ako ngayon kasi si Bes ay aking kasabay sa shift, at hindi pa kami magkalayo ng tirahan, kaya isang tao rin siyang alam kong maaari ko ring takbuhan.
Siguro nga talaga, friends come and go. Pati mga dati kong kabarkada, isa-isa na ring nawawala. Iilang mga tao na lang ang talagang natitira sa buhay kong nananatiling malalapit sa akin. Pero sa bawat pagkawala naman ng isang kaibigan, marami namang mga bagong mukha na pumapalit.
Pero hindi porket "friends come and go" nga eh hahayaan na lang rin natin na maging ganun ang mga pangyayari. Naniniwala pa rin ako na kung pagkakaibigan lang naman ang relasyon, maaari pa namang masagip yun. Alam kong iba pa rin ang ligayang madudulot ng mga "old friends" na talagang tumatak na sa mga puso at isip nating lahat.
Basta ang importante ngayon, pahalagahan ang bawat kaibigan. Binigay yan ng Panginoon upang may gawing isang importanteng bagay sa buhay mo. Ikaw na bahalang umalam ng dapat nilang maging misyon sa iyo. Kung sakaling mawala man sila, malungkot, oo, pero dapat maging masaya ka pa rin dahil dumaan sila sa buhay mo upang magdagdag ng kulay sa dating ordinaryo mong mundo.
Friday, November 27, 2009
Stupidity.
I just realized that I AM (yes, at present, I mean, just a few moments ago) hurting myself yet again.
A few minutes ago, I was looking at my ex-boyfriend's page at Friendster. Frankly, I found him cute on his current profile photo.
A few minutes ago, I was looking at my boyfriend's ex-girlfriend's Multiply site (which, I have discovered, is not updated. Because if it really is, she would have removed all of his comments there. Technically, the site still has his comments.) and a few days ago, her Friendster account.
A few days ago, I was busy looking at the pictures of my boyfriend with that ex-girlfriend, on his Multiply account. Honestly, those really did not bother me in the beginning, but I guess it starts to as time goes by. So, I honestly told him what I felt, and I'm thankful that he removed the photo albums which involved them.
As I was kinda hopeless in my coding spree, this came to my thoughts: why am I doing this, if I know doing these things hurt me so much?
Maybe, because...
I am amazed on how things and time fly by so fast. There came to a point in my life that one close friend was just someone whom I share my detailed experiences with, and little did we know that this close friend and I would actually end up being together.
I am amazed on the situations I have been through. (Magta-Tagalog na ko ha? Di ko na kaya eh. Hahaha.) Dati kasi, itong close friend ko na ito, nattiyempuhan kong online, tapos magkaaway daw sila ng girlfriend niya. Ngayon, ako na ang umaaway sa kanya. Hahaha. (Di naman ako ganun ka-harsh.)
Nakakatuwa lang isipin talaga na talagang mapaglaro ang tadhana.
At masaya ako sa kinahinatnan ko ngayon.
Pero kung bakit ko sinasaktan ang sarili ko, maliban pa sa aking amazement (meron bang word na ganyan?) sa mga nakaraang pangyayari, honestly, di ko talaga alam. Siguro e sadyang sira-ulo lang ako. Adik eh.
Siguro, para gisingin ang sarili ko sa kung anong meron ako ngayon. Siguro ganun na lang talaga ang nakaraan: mga alaalang hindi na mababalikan, kasi iba na ang kasalukuyan, which then affects kung anong viewpoint mo ngayon sa hinaharap.
Siguro, para marealize ko kung gaano ako ka-blessed ngayon. Not just merely on having that close friend with me, pero sa kung ano pa mang magagandang nangyari sa buhay ko, on the side.
Pero as of this moment, I'm telling myself to stop. Tama na. Itigil na ang mga kagaguhang pananakit sa sarili.
Nasasaktan nga ba ako dahil may mga hurts and grudges pa ko?
Wala na akong makita sa puso kong ganun.
Tama na. Ngayon, itinataga ko sa sarili ko na hindi ko na sasaktan ang sarili ko sa kakagawa ng mga hindi na tamang bagay tulad ng mga ginawa ko. I am blessed. So blessed. Siguro e binabatukan rin ako ng Diyos sa kung bakit ko ito ginagawa, pero hindi naman talaga dapat.
And now, I have decided.
Una, gusto ko nang seryosohin ang mga bagay-bagay. Pa-unti-unti. Seseryosohin ko na ang buhay ko. Unti-unti akong babawi sa pamilya ko. Unti-unti akong uusad para makabangon sa lahat ng mga pagkakamali ko. Unti-unti kong tutuparin ang mga pangarap ko.
Pangalawa, mamahalin ko pa ang aking kasintahan. Hehehe. Narito na naman ako, nagiging makeso. Minsan lang naman ako magmahal eh. Maswerte ako kasi ang taong mahal ko ngayon ay mahal din talaga ako, at hindi siya nagkukulang. Gusto kong makabawi sa lahat ng pagmamahal na binibigay niya. Gusto ko pang maging mas mabuting kaibigan sa kanya. Gusto kong maging mas mabuting tao sa kanya. Gusto ko pang maging mas mapang-unawa at mas pasensyoso sa mga nagiging pagkakamali niya. Alam kong nababasa mo ito. Nais kong sabihin sa buong mundo na mahal na mahal kita.
Higit sa lahat, gusto ko pang makabawi sa Panginoon ko. Wala naman nang iba pang nagmahal sa akin ng higit pa sa buhay Niya, kundi Siya lang. In more ways than one, pipilitin kong ipamahagi ang pagmamahal ko sa iba, at pipilitin kong ibalik sa Kanya ang pagmamahal na ibinibigay Niya.
Now, I'm stopping this blog entry.
And now, I'll start to really love myself more.
A few minutes ago, I was looking at my ex-boyfriend's page at Friendster. Frankly, I found him cute on his current profile photo.
A few minutes ago, I was looking at my boyfriend's ex-girlfriend's Multiply site (which, I have discovered, is not updated. Because if it really is, she would have removed all of his comments there. Technically, the site still has his comments.) and a few days ago, her Friendster account.
A few days ago, I was busy looking at the pictures of my boyfriend with that ex-girlfriend, on his Multiply account. Honestly, those really did not bother me in the beginning, but I guess it starts to as time goes by. So, I honestly told him what I felt, and I'm thankful that he removed the photo albums which involved them.
As I was kinda hopeless in my coding spree, this came to my thoughts: why am I doing this, if I know doing these things hurt me so much?
Maybe, because...
I am amazed on how things and time fly by so fast. There came to a point in my life that one close friend was just someone whom I share my detailed experiences with, and little did we know that this close friend and I would actually end up being together.
I am amazed on the situations I have been through. (Magta-Tagalog na ko ha? Di ko na kaya eh. Hahaha.) Dati kasi, itong close friend ko na ito, nattiyempuhan kong online, tapos magkaaway daw sila ng girlfriend niya. Ngayon, ako na ang umaaway sa kanya. Hahaha. (Di naman ako ganun ka-harsh.)
Nakakatuwa lang isipin talaga na talagang mapaglaro ang tadhana.
At masaya ako sa kinahinatnan ko ngayon.
Pero kung bakit ko sinasaktan ang sarili ko, maliban pa sa aking amazement (meron bang word na ganyan?) sa mga nakaraang pangyayari, honestly, di ko talaga alam. Siguro e sadyang sira-ulo lang ako. Adik eh.
Siguro, para gisingin ang sarili ko sa kung anong meron ako ngayon. Siguro ganun na lang talaga ang nakaraan: mga alaalang hindi na mababalikan, kasi iba na ang kasalukuyan, which then affects kung anong viewpoint mo ngayon sa hinaharap.
Siguro, para marealize ko kung gaano ako ka-blessed ngayon. Not just merely on having that close friend with me, pero sa kung ano pa mang magagandang nangyari sa buhay ko, on the side.
Pero as of this moment, I'm telling myself to stop. Tama na. Itigil na ang mga kagaguhang pananakit sa sarili.
Nasasaktan nga ba ako dahil may mga hurts and grudges pa ko?
Wala na akong makita sa puso kong ganun.
Tama na. Ngayon, itinataga ko sa sarili ko na hindi ko na sasaktan ang sarili ko sa kakagawa ng mga hindi na tamang bagay tulad ng mga ginawa ko. I am blessed. So blessed. Siguro e binabatukan rin ako ng Diyos sa kung bakit ko ito ginagawa, pero hindi naman talaga dapat.
And now, I have decided.
Una, gusto ko nang seryosohin ang mga bagay-bagay. Pa-unti-unti. Seseryosohin ko na ang buhay ko. Unti-unti akong babawi sa pamilya ko. Unti-unti akong uusad para makabangon sa lahat ng mga pagkakamali ko. Unti-unti kong tutuparin ang mga pangarap ko.
Pangalawa, mamahalin ko pa ang aking kasintahan. Hehehe. Narito na naman ako, nagiging makeso. Minsan lang naman ako magmahal eh. Maswerte ako kasi ang taong mahal ko ngayon ay mahal din talaga ako, at hindi siya nagkukulang. Gusto kong makabawi sa lahat ng pagmamahal na binibigay niya. Gusto ko pang maging mas mabuting kaibigan sa kanya. Gusto kong maging mas mabuting tao sa kanya. Gusto ko pang maging mas mapang-unawa at mas pasensyoso sa mga nagiging pagkakamali niya. Alam kong nababasa mo ito. Nais kong sabihin sa buong mundo na mahal na mahal kita.
Higit sa lahat, gusto ko pang makabawi sa Panginoon ko. Wala naman nang iba pang nagmahal sa akin ng higit pa sa buhay Niya, kundi Siya lang. In more ways than one, pipilitin kong ipamahagi ang pagmamahal ko sa iba, at pipilitin kong ibalik sa Kanya ang pagmamahal na ibinibigay Niya.
Now, I'm stopping this blog entry.
And now, I'll start to really love myself more.
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